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Moving In Together Before I Do

Category : Divorce Rate

According to census data twenty five years ago, if you were living with your partner prior to marriage and got married eventually, you had a higher liklihood of getting a divorce than if you moved in together after marriage.  Recently, the US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention surveyed 22,000 men and women about marriage and divorce,and the results showed that living together nowadays before getting married does NOT increase the possibility of divorce.

Today, about 60 percent of couples live together before they get married. “It’s becoming so common, it’s not surprising it no longer negatively affects marital stability,” said Wendy Manning, co-director of the National Center for Family & Marriage Research at Bowling Green State University in Ohio.

Researchers with the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention looked for trends in first marriages. They interviewed men and women up to 44 years old during the years of 2006 to 2010. About 40 percent were married. The study found those who were engaged and living together before the wedding were about as likely to have marriages that lasted 15 years as couples who hadn’t lived together. But what about the couples who were living together but weren’t engaged? The new study found marriage was less likely to survive to the 10- and 15-year mark among couples who weren’t engaged when they lived together – findings similar to earlier research.

In this economy where rents are high and work is not as secure and abundant, I think we will see more and more couples moving in together before they say, “I do.” Some feel that living together before marriage may offer a solid trial run for the couple before they walk down the aisle together. In turn, they can solve the issues before they officially get married or figure out if they can be solved them at all.

The bottom line is that the study showed that living together before getting married did not cause more divorces in the future. That said, do you agree with moving in together before you get married or do you feel that you should move in after the honeymoon?

Comments (2)

There a many reasons in support of moving in together before marriage. You learn alot about a person when it’s 24/7 and the ‘honeymoon period’ wears off faster than when you are just dating. It also points out possible issues before they become big and allows you time to work on these issues privately, or, if necessary, to work on them with a therapist involved BEFORE the marriage, setting the way for success or split.

I guess it’s always helpful to “test drive” before you buy!

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