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New Article for Divorced Moms

Category : Children, Holidays

I have written a new article for DivorcedMoms.com.  It’s entitled, “Divorce Rituals Can Help Your Kids Navigate the Holidays.”

Being divorced during the holidays can be really difficult for you and your children, especially during that first year after the divorce.  You have an obligation to help your kids move forward and deal with the fact that their parents just got divorced.  The holidays are a time that children want to be around their family.  It can take some time to get adjusted to not having their parents together.  You need to try to keep things comfortable for them as you navigate your ex and keep a peaceful and festive atmosphere around your home.

Whether you’re getting along or not with your ex at this time, the interests of your kids comes first. They will want to see their cousins, aunts, uncles and grandparents on both sides as they have always done on the holidays.  So you need to communicate with your ex about making the time as stress free as possible – Christmas Eve with one parent, Christmas day with the other, etc. The goal is to make the holidays as smooth, fun and comfortable as possible for the kids.

To read the rest of the article click here.

Jane Lynch Talks About her Divorce

Category : Break-Up, Celebrity, Children

Jane Lynch ended her 3 year marriage to Lara Embry and it’s great to see that there are no bad feelings. Lynch said recently on Larry King Now,  ”It’s not dramatic. It’s not a horrible thing. It’s something that we’re dealing with. It’s two people who just decided it’s better to go apart than stay together.”

Many couples seem to grow apart and it seems to be what happened to them.

Lynch also said, ”All’s good. We have a little girl – she has a little girl who’s very dear to me. She’s 10, and she’s doing great … We have to remain adults, which we have. We keep everybody’s – especially Haden’s – good in our mind.”

New Huffington Post Article

Category : Children, Ex-Spouse, Huffington Post, Seasons

My latest article for the Huffington Post was posted today! It covers how parents need to make sure their children have a fun summer even though they are going through a divorce. Please hit the “like” button and please share the link with anyone you think it may help. Thanks so much!

If you’re going through a divorce, it has nothing to do with your kids enjoying their summer. As parents, you both have to rise above your differences when it comes to the children.

Don’t Let Your Kids Divorce the Summer

Now that school has ended for the summer break, your kids will be around the house much more. So keep a lid on the tension surrounding the divorce even though it may be difficult to do at times. This is important because you want your children to enjoy the carefree atmosphere of summer. Both parents need to keep this in mind. The divorce is tough on kids, but making them live it every day emotionally with you is not fair.

Here are seven ways to make sure your children have a wonderful summer despite the divorce.

To read the rest of the article click here.

Co-Parenting In Hollywood

Category : Celebrity, Children

Co-parenting is really tough, so I can imagine how difficult it must be in Hollywood. There are many parents being acknowledged by the press as doing a positive co-parenting job together, which is always great to see. From Bruce Willis and Demi Moore to Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony and more, celebs might not have been able to save their marriage but they are on the same page as parents.  The Huffington Post posted a recent article about celeb mom and dads who got it right with co-parenting.

Dramatic, drawn-out divorces may be a common occurrence in Hollywood, but these celeb couples prove that splitting up doesn’t have to be an all-out war — especially when there are kids involved. To read the rest of the article click here.

Divorce at Your Wedding

Category : Children, Ex-Spouse, Friends and Divorce, Wedding Bands, Wedding Dress

Marriage is one of the most momentous times in someone’s life. However, when the bride or groom has to navigate the event around their divorced parents things can get difficult.

In a recent New York Times article entitled, “Divorce Whisperer: Mediating with Parents Isn’t Easy,” they look into how divorce in a family can really affect the wedding. For example, there’s lots to think about when making a wedding seating chart because some parents just don’t talk after a divorce.  In the Times article, etiquette expert Peggy Post said. “There are all kinds of minefields, from where does everyone sit to the receiving line.  It’s particularly tricky when estranged parents do not want to be in the vicinity of each other.”

Not all weddings have divorce negativity.  One of the most heartwarming stories in the article involved Zinzi Edmundson who getting married this summer and was nervous when she let her biological father know that her stepfather would marry the couple. She said in the article, “In essence, my dad, who does not wear his heart on his sleeve, said that he appreciated that my stepdad had been there for me for all those years. He even offered that they co-walk me down the aisle. I didn’t anticipate that at all and it was such a sweet gesture.”

I would say the moral for of the story for the divorced parents out there is that this marriage is not about you. Put your issues aside and keep the aisle clear! I know it’s easy to say, but the moment you don’t let it bother you shows you have moved on with your own life.  And that is a great wedding gift for your child!

To read the entire article click here.

Living Under the Same Roof Post-Divorce

Category : Children, Ex-Spouse, Favorite Articles, Huffington Post

Have you heard of ex-spouses still living together after a divorce? It’s happening often these days. Check out my latest article for The Huffington Post that covers this trend. Here is some of my article below:

With the difficult economy, you hear about more and more couples who get divorced and find themselves still living under the same roof.  Often, this is due to financial issues and the inability to sell their home (probably their largest single asset) in a bad real estate market.

With few options available, the most obvious one is for two people to live together in the family home as they wait for it to sell.  If you have children, I think this situation must be really difficult to maneuver .  The divorce is confusing enough for kids to understand without compounding the problem by their parents still living together.  If there are no children, it may be easier to take this path for a short while.  Either way, I can’t imagine it being a picnic living with your ex after a divorce. If you are forced to do this for the time being, here are some tips that may help keep the household peaceful.

To read the rest of the article click here.

Dating While the Divorce is Being Finalized

Category : Break-Up, Children, Dating, Huffington Post

My latest article is up and live on the Huffington Post! It’s entitled, “Dating During Divorce.”  It covers what you may want to consider about being ready or not to date while your divorce is being finalized:
People have mixed feelings about dating while going through the divorce process. While dating someone new can boost your confidence after a break-up, should you wait until the divorce is officially over before seeking out someone new?

Returning to the single life is a major adjustment. However, it also offers an exciting second chance at love. Some people have no issues dating before the divorce is final. Others would rather sign the divorce papers before moving ahead. And still others think they won’t date until the divorce is finalized, but they change their mind when they meet someone new. You just never know when fate will intervene and a new special person will come along.
Here are some reasons that dating during divorce may be the right choice for you:

To read the rest of the article click here.

Keeping Things Positive For The Kids

Category : Children, Favorite Articles, Huffington Post

My latest article for The Huffington Post entitled, “Memories Light The Corners of Your Child’s Mind,” is up! It’s so important to keep things positive for your kids after a divorce. This article will offer you some helpful tips. Check it out by clicking here.

Divorce & Kids

Category : Books, Children, Healing

I just read this cute little children’s book about a divorces’ impact on young kids entitled, “Standing on My Own Two Feet: A Child’s Affirmation of Love in the Midst of Divorce.”

Divorce is a difficult time for the parents, but let’s not forget about the children.  They are often in a state of confusion and self blame.  They can feel they should have done more to keep their parents together.  Or, even worse they feel the divorce is their fault.  This book addresses these problems and is delivered in a humorous, healing and straight-forward manner that’s easy for children to understand and relate to.

The book is seen through the eyes of Addison — a regular kid whose parents are going through divorce.  The multi-talented author and illustrator, Tamara Schmitz, delivers lines that children will relate to like, “Just like I have two feet… I have two homes.” The moral here is no matter what happens, Addison’s parents will always love him.  Great drawings.  Fun writing. This will help ease the transition for any child whose parents are divorcing.

For more information click here.

To pick up the book click here.

Children and Divorce

Category : Celebrity, Children

 

One of the biggest casualites that are sometimes forgotten about during the divorce process are the children.  The kids were there for it all, especially the fighting that happens pre-divorce as well as during and post.  The oldest daughter of Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria Shriver, Katherine (pictured above),  is in the media as of late speaking about her parents failed marriage after 25 years together.  She has been quiet, but broke that silence Harpers Bazaar and was very open about her feelings.

“Me and my siblings have never really been in the spotlight growing up,” she told the magazine. “My parents always really sheltered us, so when [the separation] started happening, it was like everything came out of nowhere overnight.”

She says the media backlash began shortly after. “I would go out to lunch, and literally 20 people would come and scream at me. And I’m like, this is so inappropriate; you’re trying to provoke me to have an attack and say something crazy.”

She spent time in London to escape the scandal where the split wasn’t as big of a deal. Still, she says she doesn’t pay any attention to tabloids. “I see them, but I choose not to read the stories because I figure whether it’s true or not, I don’t need to,” she explained. “I just focus on my family and everyone being okay instead of following the gossip.”

Katherine goes on to say that, “I really do believe everything happens for a reason.  A lot of the time, it’s hard to understand in the moment why things are happening, but I really do think that. I also like to think God doesn’t really give you anything you can’t handle.”

It’s hard on normal families, I can’t imagine one that is in the spotlight like they are.  What do you feel parents can do — or, don’t do –  to make the divorce process as easy as possible for their children?  Share some of your ideas.