followUs followUs

“You’ve Got” To Celebrate Your Divorce

Category : Internet, Interviews, Moving On, The Divorce Ritual

I recently had the pleasure of being interviewed for an episode of AOL’s hit series “You’ve Got.”  The series has featured many notable guests, including Matt Damon, Edward Norton, Jessica Alba, Glenn Close, Bette Midler and Dan Rather, among many others.  On this episode, I discuss my new book “The Divorce Ritual” and the importance of keeping your spirits up during and after a divorce.  

“You’ve Got”…to celebrate your divorce! To watch the episode click here.

To check out some really fun sample highlights from “The Divorce Ritual” click here.
To pick up your copy of The Divorce Ritual” click here.

Divorced Served Hot!

Category : Books, Interviews

Once you’re divorced, it’s inevitable that you will have to head back into the singles scene — never an easy place to go. However, two very talented authors and all around hot chicks, Jodi Lipper & Cerina Vincent, have made the transition that much easier for women with their book series.

I first saw Jodi and Cerina on The Today Show and was quite impressed. Their interview was not only fun, but empowering. I immediately decided to check out their Hot Chick books and I was not disappointed. They let readers know that we all have a lot of hot chickness, even after a divorce! And once you realize your hotness and project that confidence to the world, things start falling into place. From their advice on the hidden joys of being single to how to send out magical Hot Chick Vibes to falling in love without freaking out to survival techniques for heart-wrenching breakups, they’ve covered all of the bases. Not to mention, I love all of their book cover designs!

I spoke with Jodi and Cerina about how any woman can unleash their inner Hot Chick after a divorce. Here’s what they had to say.

What should a Hot Chick do the day her divorce becomes final?

Fist we want to make sure that everyone knows our definition of a Hot Chick, which is a confident, empowered, passionate woman who knows what she wants in life and how to get it. In all three of our books (How to Eat Like a Hot Chick, How to Love Like a Hot Chick, and Live Like a Hot Chick) we teach women how to approach every part of their lives like the savvy, sexy Hot Chick that they are! This goes for divorce, too. On the day a Hot Chick’s divorce becomes final, it’s a good idea to have already made some fun plans that she can look forward to so that she doesn’t get tempted to throw a pity party, instead. She should do anything to avoid drinking or eating too much while watching her wedding video, A Love Story, or even The Bachelor. Celebrate the beginning of this new chapter of your life instead of mourning the ending of the last one with a night, a day, or a whole weekend of activities that sound fun and rejuvenating. Go out with some girlfriends to your favorite restaurant, or go away for a weekend to a yoga retreat. Starting off on the right foot by acting like the Hot Chick that you are will help you feel positive about the future.

How do you feel like a Hot Chick again after a divorce?

Even if you hate your husband more than most democrats hate Sarah Palin, it’s still going to be hard to move on and feel confident after a divorce. Like during any difficult time in life, you need to treat yourself tenderly. But looking on the bright side, this is the perfect time to re-evaluate and revamp your life. Make sure you are taking care of yourself physically and emotionally by exercising regularly, which gives you a great endorphin and energy boost, and by taking the time to think about what you want out of the next phase of your life. Fill out the Build a Boyfriend program in How to Love Like a Hot Chick to determine what you want in your next relationship (not that we’re rushing you into one, by the way!) or work on the Magical Master Plan in Live Like a Hot Chick, which will help you create the life of your dreams. Creating a plan for the future is a great way to start looking forward to it.

What should a divorcee do if she is feeling insecure to be single again?

Feeling insecure is normal and natural, and the best way to combat it is to look at it head on, acknowledge it, and dismiss it. It’s not real. It’s just your pretty mind playing tricks on you, and your fears creeping into your head. Know that you have NOTHING to feel insecure about. There is nothing wrong with being single, and being in a relationship will not automatically make you happier. Plus, if you want to find love again, trust that you will. You just need to be specific about what you want this time around, and when the time is right, step back out into the world with an open heart, knowing that you are a Hot Chick who absolutely deserves true love.

Physically, do you suggest a “Hot Chick makeover” of some sort?

Although being a Hot Chick is not about the physical, sometimes making little physical changes can really helps boost your confidence and help brighten your emotional state. If any Hot Chick is feeling less than absolutely beautiful inside and out, then yes, we do suggest that she take some time to make small adjustments that make her feel her best. It can be as racy as a bikini wax, as simple as buying a sexy new bra, or as drastic as chopping of all your hair and dying it bright red! You are a Hot Chick, and this is a great time to help you feel as beautiful as the rest of the world already sees you.

Does a Hot Chick stay in touch with her ex after a divorce. And, if so, why? (No, really why?!)

If there are children involved, then you have to stay in touch with your ex for your children’s sake and make sure that you are providing as stable a life as possible for your children. You should make some clear rules so that you don’t get confused about what role he’s playing in your life (and your children’s). However, if there are no kids keeping you two in each other’s lives, we do suggest cutting ties. It will be much easier to move on if you’re not brought back to the past by seeing or talking to someone who is now a part of your past, not your future. Clearly this relationship was toxic for you, or else you would not be getting divorced! By staying in contact with your ex, you are continuing to let that toxic relationship hang over your head and exist in your present life. It will prevent you from being clearheaded about what you really want in your future, and it will really hinder you in opening yourself up to finding a healthy love. It will be hard, but the best thing is to file away those divorce papers and move on!

Please give us your top five tips to how a Hot Chick can survive a divorce and grow.

1. Know you are a Hot Chick who deserves all of the goodness that life has to offer. The first step towards getting what you want in life is to know that you deserve it, so go out into the world telling yourself you are hot, confident, empowered, and passionate, and soon the rest of the world will start treating you that way.

2. Keep your girlfriends close to you! You can’t go through this alone. You need a support system, and there is no better one than your gal pals who will get drunk with you, eat ice cream sundaes with you, and stay up until 3 a.m. talking, giggling, or crying with you.

3. Keep your family in the loop. We know that not every girl has the best relationship with her mom and dad, but it’s during times like these when we need to lean on our families, who will love us unconditionally no matter how hard we fall. (Plus, you can’t cry to your girlfriends every night; they have lives, too.)

4. Do three healthy, motivating things every day that are just for YOU. This is a tough time, and it’s important to give yourself things to look forward to that will help you get out of bed every morning and face the world. They don’t have to be big, expensive, or fancy. Exercise, read a chapter from a motivating self-help book, and how about a glass of wine, a hot fudge sundae, or a hot oil treatment for your hair? Post new, fun pix to Facebook, paint your toenails, and go to a bar to watch football with a co-worker. We don’t care what they are; just pick three things that make you happy every day and find a way to fit them into your life.

5. Do a one time, full out mourning session. If you start feeling low, it might help you move on by choosing one night (just ONE) to mourn your marriage. Pour a glass of wine (just ONE) and look at those wedding pictures, re-read old love notes, and honor the relationship for what it was. Write in a journal about what you learned, what you’ll do differently next time, and what you wouldn’t change for the world. Then file away those photos and notes along with the journal, and tell yourself that you’ve mourned, it’s over, and it’s time to truly move on with love and appreciation instead of heartbreak and resentment.

To pick up their books click here.

When Nora Met Charlie

Category : Interviews

This is a fan letter to Nora Ephron. She is an amazing writer, so funny, clever, and interesting. What can I say, every time I’ve read something she has written, I am in awe of her talent.

The “When Harry Met Sally” scribe has been divorced twice and recently discussed the topic of divorce with Charlie Rose. Two of her comments that bear repeating and thinking about are as follows: “Marriages come and go, but divorce is forever.” And “Falling in love is the first drama, and then getting divorced is the next drama.”

When Charlie asked, “Is divorce more interesting than marriage?” Nora responded, “Probably.” To watch the entire interview click here.